Book group: A Silent Tsunami

We read a book that’s part memoir of a mother’s dementia, and part interpretation of the science.
 

Anthea Rowan is an award-winning journalist who’s written extensively about her late mother’s experience of Alzheimer’s.

In A Silent Tsunami, she reflects on the impact of dementia on her mother and their relationship, relating this to what’s known about the science.

Dementia journeys

Donna Stephens in Hampshire says, ‘It is a very personal account threaded through with scientific findings, that makes for a very moving and informative read.

‘The book’s title refers to “the long, silent period of this disease before dementia develops, but it’s only silent because we are not listening properly.”’

A Silent Tsunami, by Anthea Rowan

SeaSwallow says, ‘As a child, the author says she could see and understand that her mum had depression. 

But it took her a long time to see the dementia developing.

The author’s account resonated with Amanda’s experiences of her mother’s Alzheimer’s disease, despite many aspects being different.

‘This highlighted to me how everyone’s journey is unique,’ says Amanda, ‘and how dementia’s progression may also be influenced by the environment the person lives in, support available, whether or not the person themselves believes that they have dementia, and the multitude of symptoms that can be exhibited.’

Donna adds, ‘She raises a lot of questions, and this makes for a very thought-provoking read which has stayed with me long after I turned the last page.’

Different perspective

For Jim Marshall, a dementia adviser in Dorset, the book felt quite different.

‘I’m from a similar situation as the author in that my own mother was bipolar for all my life, and she was living with dementia towards the end.

‘The first thing that struck me when I was reading the book was a feeling of distance.

It felt a bit detached, as if she was talking about her mum as a patient

In contrast, SeaSwallow felt, ‘There was something endearing about the author’s mum, and it was hard reading about her depression, stroke and decline as a result of dementia.’

Science and research

Donna found Anthea’s account evocative and engaging.

There comes a stage when her mother no longer recognises her, and this is a difficult and very emotional part of their story.

‘When a longstanding friend no longer recognised me, I felt a stab to my heart. I felt diminished myself, as if by her forgetting me, my own memories were being diminished. And this was a friend, not my mother.’

Amanda says, ‘I found the frequent links to science and research interesting, but I also felt these explanations led to the flow of the story being a bit disconnected and having to think where I was in the story.’

‘The story would often go back and forward in time, leaving me a bit confused.’

Depression and dementia

SeaSwallow says, ‘The book has clearly set out chapters, which chart the author’s journey whilst she tries to understand her mum’s dementia and tries to link it with her past history of extreme depression.

Within some chapters she goes backwards and forwards in time and place, and I found this very disconcerting.

‘However, when the author was writing about a particular aspect of her care for her mother or her mother’s decline, her writing flowed well and was so heartfelt.’

Donna notes that many carers would relate to the story.

‘Anthea looked after her mother for such a long time and with such love and caring, but after her mother’s death, she still expresses carer’s guilt.’

This is a theme that is returned to again and again on the Dementia Support Forum by anguished carers.

Who should read this

Our reviewers had different ideas about who’d benefit most from A Silent Tsunami.

Amanda says, ‘I think this book would be useful to read for those who may be at the beginning of their journey with dementia, as it gives some idea of what one might expect.

‘People who are at later stages may find another type of book more useful – one that looks more specifically at coping strategies, both practical and emotional.’

SeaSwallow says, ‘I would recommend the book to anyone who is interested in knowing if there is a link between depression in early life and dementia.

Although it is hard to read at times, if a reader wants to know more about the devastating effect of dementia, the book does not hold back.

This makes Jim hesitant to recommend it without reservation.

‘It’s not a book for the fainthearted,’ he says. ‘I’d usually point carers to something with a warmer feel. I would recommend it to professionals though.’

Donna says, ‘This book holds a wealth of experiences and information. Anthea researches every stage of her mother’s dementia, and the end of life chapter I found not only very moving, but very informative and helpful.’

Your turn

For our next book group, we invite you to read Ten Days, by Austin Duffy (Granta, 2022), 272 pages, £8.99, ISBN: 9781783786312. Also available as an ebook.

Tell us what you think of this novel about a widowed man and his daughter connecting with his conservative Jewish in-laws in New York. Alzheimer’s ends up playing a significant role.

Email us by the end of 2 March 2025 or comment below. 

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Dementia together magazine

Dementia together magazine is for all Alzheimer’s Society supporters and anyone affected by the condition.
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Dementia together magazine is for all Alzheimer’s Society supporters and anyone affected by the condition.
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