My beautiful mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and Vascular in 2020. We realized something was wrong when she couldn't remember names or places. Once diagnosed my mum took it all in her stride and just got on with life. At times she was sad, but mainly her happy self until 2024 when it really took hold. She became withdrawn, sad and full of anxiety. Worrying about things, becoming upset quickly and just generally low. We carried on taking her out to places she loved to visit like The Abbey gardens and Anglesey Abbey. Felixstowe was a real favourite of hers.
Sadly, eating became a real issue and she would struggle and worried about it, but we didn't stop taking her out, I just fed her and she seemed ok with me doing this for her. Toileting then started and this really had an inpact on her mood and her wanting to just stay in doors. She didnt like using any other toilet but her own at home. We had to support her with this as she couldn't manage this alone. Sadly Dementia takes away privacy and dignity as tasks that you have managed all your life just stop being manageable. However, we got through it and fully supported her which she allowed us to do. I felt like my mum was now my child and all the parts of life my mum had taught me, I was now using. Caring, patience, loving, nurturing, feeding, bathing, all personal care, sorting, teaching and supporting a loved one. Never once did I feel I couldn't do it. She was and always will be my mum and I would have done anything for her. The last year of my mums dementia journey was hard, heart breaking and a journey of discovery with strength I never thought I had. To watch your mum suffer, cry, shout, scream and struggle is the hardest time of my lifer and hers. To see her standing there with her head against the wall shouting that she didn't know what was happening and that something was in her head will stay with me forever. To listen to her ask who and where she was and that she wanted her mum was heart breaking. All I could do was to try and hold her and tell her how much she was loved. To watch my dad suffer and for him to see the woman he had loved for over 65 years turn into a shell was devastating and still breaks my heart just thinking about it.
After mum suffered from a few infections and hospital admissions, we made the decision to stop all medication that mum was taking for her heart. This was keeping her alive and keeping her nightmare alive. As much as I loved my mum and as much as I did not want her to die, I also couldn't sit back and watch her suffer day in and day out with this torture going on in her head. So, after her last hospital admission, mum came home with all the equipment needed and we looked after her until the end. We had a care company in for support and community nurses. They listened to us and supported the decisions we made for mum. The last two weeks were torture for us. Mum was asleep for most of it and was pain free. We weren't. To watch your mum laying in front of you, getting weaker and weaker every hour will be the most hardest time of my life. To not be able to listen to her voice again, not to be able to have a cuddle from her, not to be able to ask her advice or dance in the kitchen with her. I never thought that would come. But it had. The last words that my mum answered back were when I told her I loved her one day. Mum had been lying in the hospital bed for a few days at this point and mainly asleep, but she answered with "I know". This will stay with me forever as I know in my heart, she knew I was there and that she was loved more than anything. My mum passed away on the 9th November 2025. I miss her every day and am angry with Dementia for taking her away from me and my family. I have been grieving for over 5 years since the day of her diagnosis, but have kept strong for her and my dad. Laughing, joking, playing, cuddling, kissing, going back to family holidays, looking at photos, just making the most of every day.
Now, 6 months later, we have gone through our first christmas, our first mothers day and my first birthday without my mum being her. This has been tough and I have cried many tears but I have to keep strong for my dad who is still heartbroken and lost.
Life can be hard but, I feel blessed to have had my mum and I feel cherished and loved with the time we had together.

My wife and I had been married for 30 years when Betty was diagnosed with dementia. I nursed her for 8 of her last9 years, it was hard going but I did not begrudge her the time. One morning, near the end I went in to see her and said 'Morning Betty, its.Robin' To which she replied'Husband'. That spark was just that long but it made my day.

My Dad had dementia it happened very quickly ...it was so hard to watch my Dad change so much.He passed away 10th may last year .It was a very hard and soul destroying thing to watch.My Dad was and always will be my hero x

Liz and I have been married for 55 years (My sunshine girl). Firstly she went down with Cerebella Atrophy 8 years ago, then Vascular Dementia followed by Alzheimer’s 3 years ago. I was her carer until 2 years ago when I broke my back. Carers at home were a disaster so she had to go into care in a secure in a secure care home - she loves it. Keep up research so others can find a cure

Sadly too many friends and family have been taken to this cruel disease. My mother faded gently away to vascular dementia 16 years ago, and we have just been to the memorial service of another good friend who hasn't known us for several years. Her devoted husband looked exhausted. In between, cousins, school friends and neighbours have all gone that way. Please let research find a way to stop this happening. Longevity is not always a good thing but wonderful for those of sound mind.

When my stepdad was 61 he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. He fought bravely for 17 years. When organising his funeral I noticed my 78 year old mum was struggling and very panicky with the details of it all so it was left to me to sort everything. Shortly after I contacted the GP and started the process of getting mum tested. Mum has Vascular Dementia. Sadly mum is now in full time care. These destructive diseases have affected two amazing people and their families for the last 19 years.

This is my story of an incredible person i first met 50 years ago through work, he took me under his wing and neutered me in aspects of life and work, along with his beautiful wife Carole and my wife Linda we enjoyed social events and had such the best times, always having a laugh and playing practical jokes, he was a very talented football and squash player and no matter where you went he would know someone. Thank you Billy xxx

My mum is was diagnosed with vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s in 2016
In 2018 my Dad was admitted to hospital as his prostate cancer had advanced to his spine after I sat with my Dad until he passed my I went to break the news to my mum. In this two weeks her memory of his was lost and after being married for more than 60 years she barley acknowledges his death
Despite her and dads wishes to keep her at home after three months I was seriously struggling and after doctors advice she was mover to the excellent care home of Brendon care
She started to me interactive and chattery and her eating improved
In 2019 on a visit from my brother we sat with her and there was a very brief recognition and smile form her as she looked at us both
On the Friday before lockdown in 2020 when I arrived to visit she smiled at me in recognition. She could not say I was her daughter of my name as those connections were lost but it was a smile of recognition
After that her face and eyes were always blank and for the next four years she just existed
Her finally passing was January 21st 2024
Dementia took her ability to live but not her life

Remembering Penny Bates who died on February 13 th 2026
She was a dear friend and many years a member of the WI - much missed for her generosity , love if life and a ready smile. RIPX

My husband was diagnosed with mixed type dementia about 8 years ago and died in a care home 2 years ago. I managed to keep him at home for 6 years. I can remember telling my GP that there were 26 hours in my day, she gave me a strange look and I said no I had not made a mistake someone had definitely added a couple on for me. Difficult times, I've found myself again. It took a little while but I'm there. Will keep supporting Alzheimer's Research Society as both my daughter and myself think this is the way forward.