Real stories

Taking each day as it comes after my dementia diagnosis

Army veteran Philip, 88, was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment (MCI) after his wife, Gail, noticed he was becoming forgetful and he later received a dementia diagnosis.

He's always been an outdoorsy, practical and active person, and he's determined to stay that way. With Gail by his side, they try to make the most of every day and savour the joys in life. 

Before Philip developed dementia symptoms

My first job was as a coal miner, then when all the mines closed down I joined the army.

I was in the Royal Engineers until I was 55. I loved it and eventually worked my way up to the rank of major. I travelled everywhere – Gibraltar, Canada, US, north Africa, Northern Ireland, Germany. I don’t tell many people, but I received an MBE for my military career and I met the Queen several times.

When I left the army, I helped out my sister and brother-in-law, who ran a hotel in North Wales. It was a very different life, but it was just a question of being friendly with people.

Outside of work, I loved climbing and being outdoors. I’m very practical – I built my own house. When I say ‘built a house’, I took over a dilapidated shed with great views and turned it into a beautiful stone cottage. It was a great experience. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Before Philip’s dementia diagnosis

My dad had dementia and my brother Chris too – sadly he died during the Covid pandemic.

It was my wife Gail who first noticed my early symptoms, such as a lack of concentration and a habit of leaving things without finishing them. I was always a bit of a forgetful person anyway, but she insisted I get checked out.

The first diagnosis I received was mild cognitive impairment. They told us to go back if my symptoms got worse and so we did a few months later. Gail had noticed I was forgetting the answers to questions that I’d already asked.

After all the tests, I was diagnosed with dementia.

In a way it was a shock, but in another I was expecting it. 

Gail and I decided to approach it as just another thing to deal with – we’d take each day as it comes.

Since my dementia diagnosis

I’m still an optimistic person – I always have been. Gail’s my rock.

We try to do as much as we can together, including the weekly shop. Although I got in the wrong car at the supermarket recently!

Gail encourages me to carry on with the things I love doing, including gardening. Only now, she will often stand in the background and oversee.

I still enjoy being outdoors and we go walking together. We have a busy social life, including going ballroom dancing once a week. We’ve been doing it a long time and will continue as long as we can.

I used to play snooker with my mates, but now we meet for coffee, to chat and play cards. It’s important to me that we keep getting together.

I still feel positive about life. My father made it to nearly 80. My brother made it to 83. 

I am already 88, so I feel lucky to have lived the life I have.

I am sad for Gail because she’s been through a lot in life and is now caring for me. But the truth is that this is happening and we have to deal with it.

We’re not looking ahead much further than enjoying the present moment as much as we can.