Real stories

How dementia-friendly discos are making a difference

‘It’s just so lovely hearing from people about the difference it makes to come to our events,’ says Kate Darby in Stockport, Dementia Disco’s co-founder and CEO.

‘Quite recently, a lady with dementia who had danced all night came right up to me, looked me straight in the eye, and said, “I’ve had the best time,” and gave me a cuddle. It was so special.’

This is exactly the response Kate and her brother Nick Shaw hoped for when they first had a kernel of an idea, after their dad’s diagnosis with Alzheimer’s disease at the age of 66. 

Holding our first Dementia Disco

‘We’d take Dad to all the wonderful support groups in the area,’ explains Nick.

‘They were lovely and friendly, but they were catering towards an older audience. 

Dad didn’t want to sing around a piano and he just wouldn’t engage.

‘He loved music from the 60s, 70s and 80s, things like Bruce Springsteen, Dire Straits and Fleetwood Mac.’

Thinking that their dad wouldn’t be alone in wanting a different kind of music event, the siblings came up with Dementia Disco.

And it quickly snowballed from an idea into reality, explains Kate.

‘Nick told our friend Phil, whose grandma Margaret also had dementia, about the idea. She absolutely loved it and wanted to get involved.

‘She had a contact at a local social club in Heaton Mersey, whose dad had dementia. She ended up letting us use the venue for free and even offered to make food for the evening.’

After flyering the local area to raise awareness, this first event in July 2019 attracted 40 people and was simply incredible, recalls Kate.

People got up and danced – we weren’t sure if they would and we had lots of music requests come in. 

‘We thought, “We’re onto something here,” and carried on doing that monthly disco until Covid came along.’

Dementia event for all ages

During lockdown, the team transferred their events online, tentatively restarting real-life events in 2022 with an extra venue. There’s been no stopping since then.

As well as expanding events around Stockport, Dementia Disco now offers mobile discos at care homes and a joyous annual trip to the iconic Blackpool Tower Ballroom.

One of the things the team is most proud of is that their events are a safe space.

They give people with dementia and their families and friends – children are welcome – an opportunity to just relax and have fun.

‘You might have three generations on our dance floor and it gives everyone a little bit of escape,’ says Kate.

The benefits are physical as well as emotional.

‘In surveys about the impact of coming to our events, people have told us that our events can help a person with dementia feel calmer and less anxious, meaning they have a better night’s sleep.

‘In turn, this benefits the people caring for them too.’

Volunteering for Dementia Disco

Dementia Disco’s 30-strong volunteer crew includes Jean England.

As well as being a dance enthusiast, dancing six times a week, she has a very personal reason for volunteering.

‘My mum had dementia and there was nothing like this for her – I wish there had been. I think it’s brilliant.

It’s such a friendly place, everyone is supportive, everyone knows what you’re going through.

‘My main role is getting people up on the dance floor, encouraging anyone who wants to dance but is maybe a bit reluctant. Or we’ll have a sing together if they are not able to get up.

‘I’ve got so many highlights since I started volunteering. I leave on a high after every event. It gives me a real buzz.’

Johnny Noel used to bring his late wife Hilda along to Dementia Disco.

Since she died, he has continued to attend, encouraging friends to come along too.

‘My wife died just over two years ago. She had mixed dementia and we used to love coming together.

‘One of the only positives of her having dementia was that I started going to lots of events and getting more involved in my community.

‘So when Kate and Nick wanted to get more serious about Dementia Disco, they asked me to be a trustee. I was thrilled, I love it.’ 

Increasing dementia awareness

Although Dementia Disco is all about having fun, the team is also passionate about raising awareness of dementia.

‘And about the importance of music and dance to improve the lives of people affected by dementia,’ adds Kate.

Through a Dance Against Dementia campaign, to urge the government to make dementia a priority, their local community came alive with dance.

They logged over 5,600 dances, including a 12-mile dance-a-thon and dance flashmob.

‘Alongside a dance professional, we’re now working on a plan to encourage people to dance every day for their mental and physical wellbeing.’

There are other big ideas in the pipeline, including more events in and around Greater Manchester. They’re also working to create a ‘run your own disco’ pack to enable more people around the country to start their own event.

They’re not standing still with their existing events either.

As well as introducing live slideshows at events, with pictures of historical events, music artists and disco goers’ photos, they’re keeping up with changing music tastes, says Nick.

We’ve had requests for Taylor Swift and Chappell Roan, but a big moment recently was our first request for a 90s house track.

‘If you imagine a person coming of age in the early 1990s, going to raves in their teens, they will be our disco crowd soon. We’re not far from holding our first Dementia Disco rave special.’